Monday, February 24, 2014
The song Mamas sing
Taking an active part in communicating with my children is of utmost importance to me. I like knowing that my children come to me to share their thoughts and how they view life. While I knew I could come to my mother about this or that, I didn't really have too many heart to hearts with her until I became a mother myself. My mother and I are from two different eras, I was a late 70's baby and she was a 30's baby so there was definitely a difference in how we approached motherhood. I gleaned much in how my mother raised me; I took a little from her and infused it with my own unique ideals.
There is a balance to how I approach parenting, I'm not too strict, but I'm also not too open. I don't believe in allowing my kids to make decisions for themselves that they may not be mature enough to handle yet. I also don't believe in "sugar coating" the difficult moments in life. I let them know that it's okay to be angry, sad, silly and most importantly themselves. I let them know that "real" friends will always accept them for who and what they are. It is a bittersweet moment for me; to see my young ones change year after year, month after month and day after day. They have opinions now and a lot of them! When talking to my children, I really find out so much about life.
When looking at the books they are reading or listening to songs they like to listen to, I ask questions. I ask them what it is that they like about what they are taking in. I let them know that what they decide to embrace should resonate with who they are. Yes, they are children but I believe in teaching them early on that every decision they make should make sense to them. Basically, think first, act second! Of course, emergencies call for immediate action, but for the most part, they get the gist of what I am saying.
I like when we read chapter books together or when we watch a movie together and talk about it afterward. I love seeing them smile and have fun, alone or with their friends. I am able to see a different side of them, and hear more of what makes them so unique.
Being a mother has been one of the most beautiful experiences I have had in my lifetime. I go through days of wondering; am I doing this mothering thing as best as I could be? Have I dotted all my i's and crossed my T's? This year will be milestones for my babies, one will be going into double digits and the other will become a teenager. I am in utter shock at how fast time flies, I swear I was just changing diapers and reading board books to two little people snuggled in my lap! We still have our special times together, doing things that are geared toward their interests and it helps, it makes our connection stronger. I think the fact that they know I am willingly present in their lives creates the security that they need to grow into strong young women. I only hope that my girls will continue to come to me and share their deepest thoughts and dreams.