Tuesday, April 22, 2014

Communication is a beautiful art

I find that when I talk to my kids and really listen with intent to what they have to say, I am able to have a closer relationship with them. I really love hearing their thoughts and what they feel is important in their world, it seems to make a big difference in their self esteem. I make sure my phone is out of reach for a bit, the t.v. is off and we are in a comfortable space for them to share their feelings with me. I was a child once and I remember how good it felt when I was listened to and not brushed off. I feel like I am setting the stage for the teenage years; if I talk to them now and expect us to have healthy communication patterns, perhaps it will be something they will continue as they get older. I would love for that to happen, even if they don't tell me everything they are experiencing, the gist of this practice will instill in them that they can come to me no matter what. I often learn a thing or two when communicating with my kids and believe me, they do take notice! The older my children get, the more imperative it is for me to make that connection with them. Things are different, they don't always volunteer to share every waking minute of their lives with me like they did when they were just learning how to speak. I have to make the first move sometimes when we talk, and I have to show them that I am deeply interested in what they have to express to me. I treasure our moments when we share a laugh or our opinions together, it is meaningful indeed. Perhaps I will get the scoop on their school day or be able to put myself in their shoes about an event that stuck with them when we have heart to hearts. Either way, they will know that what they have to say matters.

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